


Words left Unspoken

by WrathandFlame



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Desire, Feelings, Fingon is a teen, Guilt, M/M, One-Sided Attraction (or maybe not), POV First Person, Pining, Underage (Kinda but nothing happens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:07:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27604651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WrathandFlame/pseuds/WrathandFlame
Summary: Maitimo's mind is at a loss. For a long time he has been feeling attracted to his younger cousin something that can easily make things complicated. His thoughts and ponderings during an outing on a sunny day in Valinor.
Relationships: Fingon | Findekáno/Maedhros | Maitimo
Kudos: 9





	Words left Unspoken

It is a lovely summer afternoon as we lazily lie together in a field blanketed with Simbelmynë, those small white flowers that the ladies of Tirion love to weave amidst their hair and adorn their dresses with, to draw the attention of the young nér (men) around them. Once I would have felt entranced by such a sight myself, perhaps seduced into some silly tryst, but...not anymore.  
These days I find my mind fleeing to other things. To silky raven locks and golden ribbons. To the one that in this moment I can feel softly breathing by my side. He doesn't know it of course. Oh no, I could never tell him. I could never tell him, of how when I look into the deep blue of his irises, as he speaks to me with that gently melodic voice of his, I see my self falling, drowning in their depths. I could never tell him, of how the dimples that form around his lush lips and sparkling eyes, as he laughs that vivid laugh of his, make my heart cease to beat. I could never tell him of how my breath catches in my throat as I count the seconds between each downward flatter of his lashes. I could never tell him, because...I would be a traitor.  
Because he is in the fullest essence of the word my friend and also my blood and kin. I can already see him drawing away from me in desbelief and utter repulse, for I have stood by him since he was still a babe and always have been someone he could trust and confide in. But that is not my greatest sin. No, my greatest sin is that he is still young, too young.  
By all means I should be the responsible one, the wise one, mirror somehow my 200 years of age and yet that thought, doesn't expel his from my clouded mind. It doesn't stop me from thinking of him in the darkness of my room, long after the veil of night has fallen. It doesn't hinder that spark of desire, that is kindled within me everytime I watch him, sitting on the riverbank wearing nothing but his skin, the light of Laurelin, like a halo around him, reflected on the fresh dropplets of water still clinging on to him.  
I wish I could live forever in denial, so that I wouldn't have to feel so filthy, so false, but with every passing day it becomes clearer and clearer still, that anything like that would be foolish and impossible, for the heart wants what it wants and no being upon this world can ever hope to fight against or resist its wishes.

**Author's Note:**

> I am not sure if Simbelmynë existed in Valinor or not. Nevertheless I decided to use it. Thank you for reading:)


End file.
